I need some honest advice.
I’ve been a sex worker for 15 years, and I’ve been on OnlyFans for 5 of those. In the beginning, I truly loved it. I was super sexual, loved being an exhibitionist, and felt empowered by my work. But lately… that spark is completely gone.
I don’t feel horny anymore. I have customs that were paid for months ago, but I have to force myself to complete them. Every time I try to film, my body just shuts down – I spiral into depressive episodes that can last for days. Even though people still compliment me, and my partner regularly tells me I’m sexy, I feel gross, unattractive, and disconnected from myself.
Creating content feels ridiculous now. All the logistics – angles, lighting, hair, makeup, toys, outfits – just overwhelm me. Filming feels mechanical and hollow. I even use lube because I don’t get naturally aroused, but it still feels like I’m violating myself. Sometimes I’m close to crying just trying to get through a video.
This can’t be normal… right? I see younger creators so excited to start, and it just makes me feel old, invisible, and burnt out. But I still have customs pending. So…
What do I do? How do I keep going when it feels like this?
If it makes you feel any better, I’ve honestly hated this job since day one. But at the end of the day, who cares? Most people work an entire year to earn what we can make in a few days, so I just keep my head down and get it done
Let’s be real – very few people truly love their job forever. That kind of passion is usually reserved for hobbies, not work.
If the money is good, keep grinding while you can and invest as much as possible. The goal is freedom, and this can be a fast track to it.
It might be time to cancel those customs and give yourself a real break. No amount of money is worth feeling this miserable. Life’s too short to be this unhappy, babe – take care of yourself first.
Like others have said, cancel the customs and take a break. Your mental and physical well-being should always come first
Maybe it’s time to explore a different niche, or even consider doing something like coaching if you still want to stay in the sex work space. But first, give yourself the space to feel better.
When I started, I was doing cam sessions that involved a lot of penetration, which was hard on me physically and emotionally. It left me feeling drained. Eventually, I pivoted to femdom, and I can’t tell you how much happier I am. Now I only film that kind of content when I want to – which, honestly, is like 4–5 times a year
Most of what I do now is CFNM, teasing, denial, and power-play content. Femdom gave me back the power I felt like I had lost. I’m in control now, and it’s incredibly empowering.
Sex work is so diverse – you don’t have to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.